Cold Feet

When I was younger, if I got high or the wind blew too hard, I seemed to end up in another city. I drifted for a few years and never so much as blinked at the thought that I couldn't handle what would lie on the other end of a move. People say i was brave, but those who knew me know that in my case, there is a thin line between guts and stupidity. Now I find that even as I lay out my "Next Bold Move" with a great deal of planning, I am more nervous and anxiety ridden than ever. I get nauseous with worry. Luckily, my experiences in NY have all pretty much sucked. (Ok, a couple rocked.........but c'mon. Those were flukes) as far as really trying to exist there, That city has always kicked my ass. But, after just visiting a friend's page, i realize that maybe this is a good thing. She had all these great pictures from every tourist site and expensive restaurant. Good times. But.....I have the knowledge that this city will certainly throw punches.......and possibly high kicks.....and some ninja stars......and a toaster. I am ready to step into a ring rather than hop on a ferris wheel at this point when it comes to her. But for everyone who keeps asking why....is it Nomen? Is it NYU? Is it......? Go to the Moby.com link. I see that and I become entranced. It sums it up. I always felt so out of place everywhere. I look at that view and that skyline and I just feel like the mother ship has come to retrieve me. I never thought I would be this close to going home.